CULTURAL DIFFERENCES

(Editors: In the fourth paragraph, please add an accent mark over the "u" in "Cachun." It appears twice.)

Catherine: The more similar your background, the easier the relationship. Easy is great, but it doesn't always mean better. My Colombian mother married my American father. Thirty-three years later, my father still loves the Latin flair my mother brings to our household. My mother loves his stable personality. Their differences have caused plenty of headaches and fights, but they also bring a richness that I appreciate.

I encourage couples to be honest about differences. Latin families like to stick together. Can your non-Latino love celebrate having parents, uncles, aunts, cousins and neighbors involved in daily life? Cultural differences can cause problems because there is no easy way around them. The romantic phase of a relationship wears off quickly. If you are clear and open about your differences, the road still may be bumpy, but wonderfully rewarding, too.

Lily: There are cultural differences that surface when you date a non-Latino. Whether your "media naranja" (other half) embraces or ridicules those differences is what determines whether the relationship will work. If you believe in "mal de ojo" (evil eye), but your mate doesn't, then you may not exactly be a pair made in heaven.

Now, before you write in about how your Mexican husband and you just celebrated 100 years together and how you delight in Guinness with your "carne asada" (fajita meat), let me say to each his own. Dating outside your culture may work for some, but I want someone who will enjoy a "Gansito" (Mexican pastry) while watching reruns of "Cachun Cachun Ra Ra!" (1980s Mexican comedy series) with me.

Danny: I don't buy into much of the hype surrounding the cultural barrier where couples are involved. When and if you decide to build a relationship with someone from a different cultural background, the key is communication, understanding and maturity. This is why dating is so important. Couples should respect each other as individuals and try to build a life together. You endure the ups and downs and build on each experience. You make choices to strengthen yourself and your relationship. The differences start showing up when you forego the necessary work required to build and manage a life together.

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